Okay, I think I've been really hesitant about posting to my blog because early on I found the 30 Day Teacher Blog Challenge, and I thought that I found it at just the right time, but I have discovered that it has only made me feel very restricted in my blogging endeavors. I think blogging can really be something that is unique, raw, and real, and this challenge has presented so many structured activities, that the complacency (of which I've previously complained) has inevitably returned. I want my blog to be an extension of my mind, not the extension of something that has already been thought up.
Throughout the past couple of weeks, I've found myself reluctant to post any real thoughts because I felt bogged down by the challenge; I felt as though it were something that I had determined I would complete, so therefore I had to do it. I honestly can't remember that last time I quit something. I will generally forge through, and despite any obstacles, I will get it done.
Well, here it is, I give up the blog challenge. I'm not giving it up because it's too hard, in fact it's too mindless and easy. It's just all about answering basic questions and posting general things--things that could easily be adapted to a larger audience. I am not a large audience, and my blog is not constructed from a large group of writers or teachers; it's written only by me. If I have something that I want to discuss on my blog, then I want to be able to freely discuss it, and not have to search for the next blog challenge. I make this sacrifice of quitting in an effort to rejuvenate the spirit of my lost blog.
In a way, the challenge was probably appropriate for me, since I often have tendency to say things I probably shouldn't or write off topic. The challenge would have helped me to restrict my natural indecent tendencies. Now, I see this as a new challenge for myself. I can't let restrictions dictate the my own restrictions, but rather I must learn to indulge in multiple avenues with my own restrictions; I must form and reform myself constantly. I can't leave it up to anyone or anything else to do that for me. I think ridding myself of this "blog challenge" will help me to defeat the real challenge: construct an interesting blog. If my blogging efforts are unsuccessful after this, then it's my fault and my fault only. I guess I have to start taking responsibilities for my own writing endeavors, and I mustn't always depend on the restrictions and guidelines of others
Let the real challenge begin!